Lord Of The Things
by flying-pig
Summary: its a spoof on lord of the rings, yet there is a very sad story stiched in there (this may sound like thing as in.... you know! that thing! it's not! don't report me!!!!
1. Don't put her in charge of the title

Lors Of The whats??!?!?!?!?!? Lord Of The Things.... like it? NOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! YOU GOT IT WRONG!!!!!!!!!!!!!COMPLETELY WRONG!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Well lord of the rings was getting old so I just thought.... YOU THOUGHT WRONG!!!!!!!!!!!!!! THEY'RE COMING!!!!!!!!!!!!!  
  
  
  
Just listen! The last time I put this up someone reported me, and I think they must have thought down... you know there. so just so you know, I MEAN THING!!!!!!!!!!!! LIKE A TRAIN OR A TOY!!!!!!!! AN ITEM AN OBJECT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! 


	2. VIERAGOSE

VIERAGOSE  
  
  
  
The Vieragose is a creacher with unusual eye color and gigantic White powdered wings. They have a past time in cheating-at-poker-so-as-to-get- money. Though they would be known for this, but sadly when they are seen they are either mistaken for pixies (A very close relative to the species) and are followed till they get sick of it and kill them or they are mistaken for an evil messenger and start a fight where one or the other dies. It is because of these meetings that they have never been known to exist. It was planned to have the most normal looking to go and make friends. Though just before this a huge group of men amd elves had come to explore the caves. Many died. It is here that the 1st ever red-eyed Vieragose (along with many other 7-year-olds) was left orphaned by this mistake in time. 


	3. posers

"Call" Contallion, a 21-year-old vireagose said as she put half of her little stash into the pot.  
  
"YOU SHALL NOT PASS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" Called a voice from the chamber next door,  
  
"Who is that?" Tilia, 20 year old vireagose asked herself quietly.  
  
"NOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" screamed a different voice, this one much younger then the last.  
  
Tilia put her cards down on the table and with a beat of her gigantic wings set off to see what was the problem. Contallion look at the other players and, as if planned, jumped forward on the table and gazed at the cards,  
  
"She's been bluffing her way through the game!" Said a 12 year old who Contallion had no idea what her name was.  
  
They heard strong laughs, then a roar saying, "Why I am the great Contallion! The supreme warrior!"  
  
Contallion was used to this posing of herself that she had no idea what terrible sin Tilia had placed on herself. . such a great task could not be fulfilled by such a girl! The ring was to be taken by less thought of hands. . yet more heard of. wink, wink, nudge, nudge 


	4. off to the races

A white bird flew into the caves and made the vieragose all stare, it was pure music against the hard, stonewalls. It wasn't the appearance of the bird that caught their attention; it was the whistling and the beating of its wings, for the caves were often quiet.  
  
Speaking was rare, for they had developed a whole new language, without discussing it; they all had the same thoughts. It had no name, it was just glances. There was no certain look for one particular word. The only time they spoke was when they laughed at the conversation, or could not find a glance to compare with it.  
  
When this bird flew in, it almost scared them with the sound. Finally it landed on a tall figure, brunette, yellow eyes. (I'll explain the whole thing on the eye color later)  
  
She flicked the bird, before it flew off in a flurry of feathers. The white angel fell on a man, old and gray hair and green eyes.  
  
The bird felt safe after a few seconds, and then began its long sad song.  
  
The man's bearded face went paler than the moment before. He sighed a broken sigh,  
  
"C-C-C-Colin is dead," he stammered.  
  
Collin (this was Contallion's nick-name) collapsed on the floor, all laughed "This could be serious! Be civilized!"  
  
He shouted over the crowd (I would like to point out the man you probably imagined him to look like was old, shaggy 88-year-old. He is only 35)  
  
Contallion got up and smoothed her long blonde hair down her back, the of it was red and had been neatly left unbraided,  
  
"Not a word spoken from your mouth has been serious! None of us are civilized! As much as we fool each other into thinking we are kind are sweet, none are speaking the truth!" She got up on the chair, "stop being idiots!"  
  
The bird had not yet left the cave, its song began a proud laliby.  
  
A fiendish grin crossed the shaggy mans face, " So. do you think you can handle this.this task? How about you help the ring something or others?"  
  
Contolion fell off the chair and onto the hard stone floor.  
  
Gasping for air she recorcovered, "What? Me? What? WHAT!?!?!!?!?!?"  
  
After that she blanked out entirely until she was out over a large crystal lake.  
  
Although the lake was fantasticly beautiful, it startled her and caused her to stop the fanning of her wings and come crashing down over the peaceful harmony.  
As she sunk under the little ripples of the lake, she felt her golden, red-tipped hair get tangled in the weeds and grasses followed by the erie pain of the strands being torn from her soft scalp.  
  
Finally she became short of breath and began to panic, soon she felt her feet touch the sunken, relief that was the mud.  
  
she not only thought that the bottom meant that she couldn't sink any lower, but that also meant a kick off to the top, which meant a whole lot a fun.  
  
She bent her knees and placed her callused feet on the mud and jumped... she flew into the surface.  
  
Gasping for breath, she peered around her surroundings. 


End file.
